Being Alone

It may not come very often, that you befriend with solitude. Whenever that happens, life could be intense. Without the distraction of the outer world and social relationships, without a single soul to be seen, you see yourself clearly.

Perhaps you are not completely alone in this moment. You are watching a trace of my thoughts, something that used to be the present at some point in time. Not anymore.

It is puzzling for many to observe an introvert, asking themselves what there really is in that moment, of silence. The explanation to that is rather simple, sometimes too simple for a learned mind to grasp. What if there is nothing to disturb you anymore? What if you are at the peak of your anger? What if you are just calm, without any thoughts, without thinking, just being?

The fact is simple: we can see ourselves with utmost clarity being alone. Life has a way to balance, or re-balance itself. In a moment, a flash of insight may come. In a moment, our minds stop blaming the loved ones for mistakes that they never made. In a moment, we learn to put down that unreasonable pride that annoy people. In a moment, we see through our perception of the world change. Life can then be experienced in that very moment.

Yet that moment, perhaps, may not have all the power to change and to transform in its own right. There are countless other moments before it, when we are out and about, facing the world and collecting experiences, be happy, be sad. The feelings that resemble tiny seeds that we constantly grow or let go in our human hearts.

Thinking of the seeds, I recall our little garden that I played in through my childhood. Life itself is a continuity of things. Every tree was once a seed. By law of nature, perhaps the strongest will survive and thrive. On the other hand, perhaps changes do not come easy, because the way we feel, think and see this world is so deeply rooted that we may no longer recognize the seeds’ original forms.

However, beware of the storms, for even the deep-rooted beings can be up-rooted.

There is art in life. It is not the trees alone that makes up the garden. There are the paths, the spaces between them. There is a way to make a good garden. To take the old saying literally, where there is a will, there is a way. There is cultivation of our inner world. Perhaps the ultimate way to create a beautiful garden is not just about collecting the best seeds. After all, the change of survival for a new plant is slim when it is surrounded by bad weeds. Life is as much about nurture, if not more than, nature. Life is also about cultivating the path, the space between the trees. A path that you can walk on and admire the creation.

May you find peace.

Note: This is a reflection from my meditation practice.